1) We have naturally provided costumes for each holiday and season. Christmas is Santa, Halloween is the Great Pumpkin, Thanksgiving a Turkey, Fourth of July is a Giant Cherry Bomb, Winter is a Snowman, Summer a Sun, Spring a Teletubby, MLK as Fat Albert.
2) It is easy, to tell the truth about fat slobs like Rosie O’Donnell, Michael Moore, Megan McCain, Amy Schumer or Stacey Abrams without being self-conscience.
3) Fat people are more believable and happier. They have nothing to hide, and they don’t go around hungry.
4) Fat shaming is OK. It’s like black people calling one another the n-word.
5) There is no need to diet.
6) People avoid sitting close to you. You will be the last one to sit next to on a bus, and some will sell their souls to switch seats on a plane.
7) You always get extra portions in a cafeteria line.
8) People never try to squeeze past you in a corridor or hallway.
9) No one would even think of cutting in front of you in a buffet line.
10) We don’t wrinkle…our faces my show some folds but no wrinkles
Curmudgeon Fun 